The Snacking Vegan

Most Vegans that I speak to share a common thread. We’re all snackers.

It sucks. I usually want potato chips, but I've been teaching myself how to want a bunch of grapes instead, or an orange. Eventually, I have to find a way to see potato chips as a demon with horns, like the way my stomach turns when I see meat in the supermarket. I have to see my favorite snack like pretzels as a sure ticket to "10 Pound City". Don't act like you don't know where I'm talking about...

10 Pound City is the place you go when you've overindulged during the holidays. It's that place you visit when you've been out of the gym for about 2 months, and you keep promising yourself that you'll start walking on the treadmill tomorrow morning at 4:30 a.m. 10 Pound City is the place that you hate to visit, and you always want to leave. You wind up drinking juice and stuffing yourself with pizza at 10 Pound City. In fact, they don't serve bottled water there. You can't find fresh salads there either. Your clothes don't fit you the way you like when you visit this place. 10 Pond City is not your friend people.

Side Note: 10 Pond City is not an actual physical place- it's the place I call unhealthy weight gain, and I usually refer to this place when I'm passing the aisles that have chips, cookies and anything that remotely smells sweet from afar, but I KNOW is just going to reflect on the scale... and not in my favor. I don't like 10 Pound City. Feel free to use this phrase on the job i.e.:


Tom: Hey Tim, Sally brought in some brownies today! They're in the break-room and they taste delicious!

Tim: Sounds great Tom, but I can't! Watching my weight! Don't want to end up in 10 Pound City!

This phrase also works great at home!


Sally: Hey hunny! I've brought home the three left over brownies I made for the office today! We can have them for desert after dinner!

Todd: Oh Sally, you know I love your deserts, but I just got out of 10 Pound City, and I don't want to take a trip back there. How about some grapes?

This phrase even works on the go, like at Trader Joes!


Amazing and Brilliant Trader Joes Associate: Hi Ma'am, would you like to try our "heart- attack- in- a- bite- brownie? It's so fudgey and delicious and it's made with rich milk chocolate and an extra kick of "you're- gonna- need- some- insulin- after- you- eat- this- shish-kabob right here!"

Sally: * Inside her head (Do I look like I'm trying to go to 10 Pound City? I must have a sign that says "please block my damn arteries"). Aw thank you but maybe next time dear. *Inside her head again (Know good a and damn well I come here every week and I turn him down. I am just trying to get these grapes and leave, okay! Not today satan! No today!)

Let me stop, because I love me some Trader Joes. I especially love when I ask if the sample is vegan, and the associate has to let me down gently. I usually want to say "well open a box of something vegan then, and stop treating me like I don't a sample! Hello somebody?!

Another side note: Every time I try to type "Trader Joes", the auto correct changes it to "Hoes". I truly hope it's referring to the plow in gardening. Sigh. Auto correct is also not a friend.


Back to schedule.


So how do I stop snacking? How do I start seeing these golden potatoes as the killer from the movie Saw?

I think it's the way you should approach anything that is pretty toxic in your life. RUN FOREST RUN!! And pick up an organic kiwi on the way out of 10 Pound City. Snacking may never go away, but willpower and discipline to eat the foods that are healthier are the best options for increasing optimum health in our lives. When you know better, you do better.

As always, peace, love and light on your journey brethren.


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